Secret Sauce

i've been relegated to the keurig. yes, the keurig. at one point i was disgusted, found myself better than it. no longer. anyway, today i thought alot about bullcrap things. like if you put the word Hershey's () on a piece of shit someone would friggin eat it. seriously though, and they'd pay for it. assholes. and what about a stirrer. newsflash you can stir a drink with anything. from a set of eye glasses to the wrong end of a knife, hell even a screw driver - and that's not me trying to be funny - then again you never can tell can you. but we make something they sell just to stir things. weird. and some of them are seasonal.

ha. SEA-SONS.
that made no sense.

you are a sucker.
what kind of people are they trying to reach out to. the audience. the crowd. the demographic. mmmm. idk.

and after this little bullshit post, all i can ask myself is hello HEINZ, it's me meghan.
what's up with the ketchup. that shit is old. also, it's free at 7-11's and burger kings world wide. you can steal it from diners. bottom line it's not hard to come by.
and the 57 varieties, what the hell is that about. i've seen 2, maybe 3. i think you're full of shit - and you almost had Joe D. () - it's time to redeem yoself.

how about this, and i'm no kind of condiment genius, but it's a 1:1 ratio of ketchup and mayonnaise mixture. people would go wild. it would be sold out. talk of the town. you could have a commercial starring a ronald mcdonald lookalike (see mac sauce minus pickles).



mocking mcdonalds. you'd be a hero, a fucking pioneer.
there might be a hit out on you.

but hell it's better to burn out than fade away.

Musings To You

"i can't believe you ruined my life. actually i can't believe i let you ruin my life. or am letting you ruin my life. nah i never even had a life. not one to really ruin anyhow. i mean i put ice in my milk for christ's sake. i bet someday in the future i might though. and people think i'm pessimistic, i'm not pessimistic. well i'm hardly pessimistic. or at least i'm not pessimistic just for the hell of it. that McDonalds commercial right now. haha. a beefy McDouble or a juicy McChicken. anyway the entire thing is like when you finish the cereal and its good and bad. because on one side the cereals all gone, but on the other side you don't have to put it away. you know what it is, i've been biting my nails until they bleed and lately when i wake up i feel really weak like a might throw up. i need to know what i'm doing wrong. i strive to know. maybe i should set a deadline, i'm behaving like a skitzo. talking to myself like this, especially when i'm convinced i'm talking to you. you know what my problem is, i took everything you said so literally. as fact. how stupid can one person be. the truth is if i could just get over it, that maybe you're not the end all be all, i'd be okay. i try and tell myself that it's a wide world and there just has to be people as good, but then i think of you. in a word i'd call you supple. i know it doesn't sound flattering, but it's you, and it's why i love you. the whole thing makes it hard for me to breathe. i must say i have to take it slow or else i'd be gone. oh god, when i think of you i don't wanna leave the house, i mean i already feel stranded so nothing would change. except the nonsense where i play around. i need to sit still. and maybe find someone who'd sit with me."

Bah Humbug!

in an attempt to save what little money i happen to come by i had made the drastic choice to spend no more than 4 dollars on food. this had reduced me to pizza, mcdonalds, and bagels. it was already a sad situation my friends, and it's only gotten sadder. now i'm almost completely dependent on freebees and the likes.

i've only been out of a job a couple days now, but it's really starting to go to my head. when i was walking to school yesterday i saw a stranded McCafe cup on the side of the road, had to be a medium, or a large. i know the small looks somewhat disproportionate and silly. although i gave the cup what i believed to be a passing glance, i instinctively noticed the monopoly game pieces still completely intact. i figured it was a rushed, environmentally unconscious slave of the workforce merely overlooking the chance at an instant win. although in these rough economic conditions the instant wins seem to be few and far between and are reminiscent of a more glorious economy. i peeled away my two game pieces to reveal a railroad and some other miscellaneous property. i tossed the cup in it's proper trash receptacle. so much for dumb luck, or rather bum luck.