Two For The Show

i take rides from strangers, it's a little quirk of mine. i don't know if you've ever heard the term personal fable, but it something like that.
i just don't see it happening. that whole thing where you take a ride from a stranger and you end up chopped up, buried in a hole somewhere, deep in a wood.
i wonder what the real odds are yanno, like in terms of lightning. it's funny that's like the breadbasket of odds. "you have a better chance of being hit by lightning." well no shit. haha.
it's funny too because he had his laptop on his lap, driving, and i told him i might just be better off walking. nah, screw that.
i'll tell you though about odds, because one time i took a ride from this pizza delivery guy, and first off i never thought i'd see him again, and then i add on top of that if i did happen to run into him again i wouldn't recognize him worth a lick. but there he was ahead of me on line at 7-11. whatever the place is next door. he was wearing the shirt.

An Abomination

i stopped and asked a standing body in the snow to please take my picture. i told him i was from down south, that i've never seen the snow. it was lustful, and a lie. in my defense it was a white lie, the kind that made him feel like there was a purpose to the picture taking. specifically more than the mere fact that i wanted to talk to him. i wanted that picture too. i told him my family would go berserk over the sight of me manning the snow, cause back at home i wouldn't leave the house if there was anything over a 14% chance of precipitation. i thought the picture could capture the havoc in the air while remaining still. i laughed and said all this wet snow made me feel like i was part of a window display at a department store. a lifeless abomination. but really, i was happy like a bucket full of cumulonimbus clouds, ready to burst. and i figured since eventually it will happen i'd like to have a picture of the wave right before it crashes, or something like that.

i took two steps back from him, said cheese through my grin, and he snapped the picture. he glanced down and said "perfect".

i thanked him and offered him a stick of gum, he accepted, hailed a cab, and was off.

i took his spot standing in the snow.

Opinions, POV's, And The Whole Shebang

how hard is it to respect other's opinions? damn hard, that's how hard - but why? we all see things differently for an array of reasons, but i think it's hard for people to grasp that opinions can't be right or wrong and on top of that everyone is entitled to their own. bastards! hahah I LOVE LIFE. but anyway, it's a great adventure because opinions can be mean, nice, selfish, uneducated, researched, stupid, foul -and well just about anything right.

hey, do you think it's entirely impossible to disagree with an opinion but still respect it? for instance a racist opinion - how can you respect that? opinions are a tough topic if you ask me. we should respect other peoples opinions because being closed minded isn't a good look for anyone.
and i've tried to be honest in my own opinions and at times it's hard because i'm non-confrontational (sober anyway) and i dont want to offend anyone with my own stupidity.

but i think therefore i am - and what are we really without our opinions?

Nip It In The Bud

i was looking down at the hole in the crotch of my pants and all i can think is nip it in the bud meghan, before it gets any worse. i already had to get the other side of the inseam patched up when it formed a hole that i could fit my leg through. i'd show you a picture of these pants that i wear everyday, but i'd rather just leave it up to your imagination which will probably render it far less worse than it actually is.

i should throw them out, there's no doubt. i just can't let go. i love these pants even though they're fallen apart and aren't nearly as great as they once were. more importantly they're comfortable, i love the way they feel. what's wrong with me? they were used when i got them. and now they're just pathetic. these pants are like an open wound i constantly wear. i have no shame, you think i could find some?

thankfully summer is close, i'll have to start wearing shorts. fall comes up quickly though, i could get sucked right back in to the black corduroy pants.

i'm constantly mistaking liabilities for assets.

A Lyre

haven't you ever felt so broken you just wanted to disappear?
or so lonely you wanna throw the towel in?
could happiness become extinct , or just die out?
you know what's weird? when i was really happy, like genuinely happy, i wanted to die because i figured what are the chances i'll die happy yanno.
i looked coldly into the eyes of friend/co-worker and told her happiness is a lie. and the sad part was i believed it, for at least that second. i have, through the workings of life decided that's the lie. i think i wanted to believe it because that would have meant i'm not a total failure - yet. it could have meant i might keep things lax for a while, and stopped feeling that pressure - which has for better or worse, become my motivation. so now that i've regained my stance on happiness what am i to do?

keep looking for it.

happiness is a 9 letter word. and it's the truth.