In Three Parts

prelude:
sometimes you sit down and you tell me how you feel. i let you know the feelings they will fade. that's when you usually take a deep breath and don't exhale. i can see it hurts, but i don't object, instead - i let you be. i wonder if you even know i see you fighting. exasperating all your energy. even though i was an accessory now i'm doing the damage as i hold your head underwater just to keep things blurry.

just to recap:
you pried and it was inherent that i couldn't withstand the the faintest pressure to crack. and let a little free. and you huddled over you're snatched good, and i couldn't see your reaction so i stared away and waited for the next day. all that was me is what you thought you got, so the day after i changed, and rehearsed new lines with fresh motifs just to be sure what you got wasn't endowed. rather it was guts that have soured since i didn't pay them any attention and now you're stuck with 'em.

for the future:

it's that sound of a kiss when something turns off. that false sense you had that i defiled you, but you would have been too fond of that so it can't be true. so, my new mantra is that of a badly scarred whale - hit by a boat when i thought i was king of the jungle water. but you will keep on, but never forgive because behind your eyes lurks remedial thoughts of me. you cozied up to mistruths to keep you from freezing standing next to me. the air i give off is ice, i was never in a panic, i just wait for another cold blooded animal. and for the promises you faked i made - it was a mirage that fooled and brewed our grave friend that we've got to know so well, regret.

on my side of this story there was an ocean of life with love that suddenly dried up.on yours its still that mirage, still never really there.