i'm watching some crap tv show and i'm waiting for you, to do what i don't know. but here i am alone, well not exactly, but you know. the type of alone that keeps you hesitating when maybe you should be rejoicing in happiness. the kind that expires during the day but catches up with you at night. it was right there waiting, it didn't move.
and sitting here with an empty bottle of wine that isn't mine, characters in a match i've yet to win. when i remember how wrong i've been. its just there was this time i packed my wine in a dollar arizona iced tea can to catch the train and a guy told me he knew something was funny. you could easily see the dark red wine caught atop the lid. i felt like a bum with baggage then who wasn't at all funny, and i still do now. yet i drunkenly ruminated with him over everything you did, and we decided it was all venial - just wish you felt the same. you could let go of the careless moments i wasn't engaged to all the good everyone thought i was.
back at home i laugh and stare up because truthfully i can't get over anything, and then no feeling comes over me, but everyone gets over me.
wish i could get it.