There's No Equation, It's Far Too Complicated

 I set the dominos up, you push the first piece

Our love is a fire with a breeze

It spreads, to death

I look up out the windshield, at the night sky, navy blue, I lose track of time

I want to touch it so I reach out my hand

You’re a blockbuster, but free on demand

I love the way you ooze emotion

A stop motion picture, but you a freelance lover

I get pieces but its nearly not enough

I want all of you but can I settle for some?

I made an acquisition, but I swear that it’s done

Parts of me you can’t imagine and I hope you never have to

I’m raindrops in a thunderstorm

The least likely to feel remorse

God creates new days - new course but sometimes the clouds disparage my sight

I’ve been handed all I need I shutter cause I acquiesce

A past I can seldom leave in that tense

You ever wonder on what you’re worth depends ? Look up at the universe the subtraction don’t add up

Numerals and figures but I hear god whisper “there’s no equation, it’s far too complicated”

All saints day, tomorrow reserved for the souls

Purgatory, spell binding surgery bringing me to Christ

I’m singing throwing dice, I’ll gamble with a handful of spirits

I'm out of sight

Your Image Like Direct Sunlight

delete this message that I'm about to send you
one hand on the wheel, another in the pot, one pushing your buttons,
I love it when you shout
I'm a wolf, and i howl at the moon, i'm falling for you
and when these sky lights go off you can dream up thoughts about who you'd like to be
you're the origin of me
your hair, your marks, and i'm gasping for air in this dark
it's a shallow ditch that we drown in
there's no way around it, self sabotage never felt so glamorous
the feelings like we don't belong
but I'll be there to catch you when you fall
I think too fast, I get too hot, sweat drips red like the fire you wrote about
the ashes are so fine, they too drift up to the sky, no direction
i can barely comprehend a mix
wait, do you believe in the subconscious?
mine is rallying, ever the underdog
i think i'm a writer till i pick up the pen, 1,000 words we'll go at it again
a soul in debt to sin, I'm at it again
steal the art from your eyes, ur reflection is my only vice
your image like direct sunlight

A Diety

soul crushing. and she said “looks like you lost your best friend”. i reply that it’s been happening for a while. when I was younger I believed. And it all fell to peices. I built it all back up, but the design was so fragile. All that work for what? she says “have you had enough?”. a diety, and she believes in me, but she’s an apparition, the only one who appears to be listening.  she tells me “life begins with you”, and I remind of her what I’ve been through. She can let the dust settle on instructions and a menu, of all that I desire, ideas that coincide with facts that I’m a liar. She flatters me, my own creation, a mirror for how I’m doing lately.

Break Rank

you’re terminally ill
it seems to be contagious
I know your bad side
we practically neighbors
all the evil seems to be sedated
a massive sleeping bear, our hibernation
start to talk and my head aches
the backs of my eyelids replaced with a Microsoft sunset
I’m rapid eye fantasy, and you sway with sterile tides, always out of key, perfection that I see
marry me with silly string that I’ll wrap around your finger, you’ll have to pry me off first, "just married" stapled to the back of a hearse, pill bottles rattle as they drag along the road
celebrate a union, my undoing

these words they have no format, some rhyme and no reason, sweaty palms, i met you in time for this new season
it’s so long to these dog tags
I ended a war within myself
keep an album on shelf, rusted photos of the past, water damage, water logged, years and tears will do that
movements that impress the mind, i left the dead for you to find
I have nothing left to hide
pick me apart; you stay on the sly
we opposites, break rank for death, I’ll keep being me, you stay less and less impressed

Bombs Away

we both yell bombs away
drop an anchor, we’re here to stay
the lesser of evils, a sensual demon
a delicate doe in the winter frost
a street light blows out and we’re lost
we can’t measure the cost of a trauma
tragedy sparks interest, do what we wanna
barefoot in a dark alley, land mines in town, they know me by face, wouldn’t recognize a thought, my latest disappointment weasels it’s way into my birthday month, my problems go down like the sun and it gets dark
the future something or other, like a best friend from back in the day, we grow away, roots take hold, we outstay our welcome, time to move on
i hold you in my arms, ask why you’re saltier than the saddest sea; why you won’t come back to me, and you cordially warn me I’m misinformed about myself and suddenly winter has no end, the distance to hell depends on the price of discretionary minutes and what’s a reason for the pause when everything is moving right along
pushed the plunger on a bundle of joy, and it was all just a ploy, again pressed pause
childhood was paradise when a huge storm sunk the island to the ocean bed
and some of these wars we’re born into and some are up in our head, trouble drawing lines and marking enemies, I live in basic tendencies, is there a way out? It’s strange now, everything is wide eyed, less painful, pulled a steak out of my heart, placed it down, prone to less fighting now

An Audience

somewhere between better and worse
awake and comatose
the scars they don’t hurt, it’s visual impairment
succinct when we handle all our failures
and that’s my preoccupation, the reasons that I left the basement
and self destruction really something when u mixed up in that ego
it’s not sex, it’s a long weekend
hop in the pool, stay out of the deep end
I’ve never been right, I’ve always been sick
play the drums, let’s marry the beat
pass me a receiver, a phone call to your demons
tell them lay low and stay put, we’re all on holiday just searching for the right look
I promise it all, i deliver a thing
the mighty they fall, drag the weak by a string
tricks in my pockets and dice in my drawers, go identify our old selves up at the morgue
whisper all ur problems, I’ll sing them in a song, wrap it in a bow, throw it on a stage
We get the applause, the audience they faint

The Hook

I'm a puppet, you have control of every string except one
the one connected to my tongue
i just use it to sing lullabies, they go something like "we ain't like the other guys
we say exactly what we think, push one another to the brink" that's where we grow. absorb the lowly fashion, believe the others drastic, and hard of hearing
see the finish line? we passed it
this is the winners circle, doesn't it feel all too familiar?
this is patent pending, they can't resemble me or you - we're about to start a coup
i believe in everything, and you believe in some, pacify me translating words that mean we're never done
i talk in the future, you talk in the past, so we're never really
here
conversations span a year, you're everything my dear
never mind the same page, this isn't the same book
but you put out the line, and i repeatedly get the hook

Loose In A Cloud

I took a razor to all the labels on my clothes, that's as far as embroidery goes. A clean slate, a cheap date. the last summer lasted a minute, coming up it's gonna be a mile, I'll go out in style. i get high like the sky, let my thoughts loose in a cloud, they bounce around and lose their earnestness, this relationship is earning us an honorary degree in monogamy. off the market, I'm charming but shy, and I know you ain't the type. I'm devoted to you, I've got nothing to lose, opportunity comes knocking, it can take the door of the hinges, I'm not listening, you give me tunnel visions. you say you never will elect me, i'm scared of the dark, not your bite but your bark. your words plant a stake in my moon and they revolve around my perception, pervade every thought with an honorable mention, this happened too soon, I'm strange and I'm small and you alone answer my call. everything that isn't you is imitation, i sin with patience. you assign a different penance daily, i commit to atonement, its continuous, I'm into you.

Some Action

you got a black sail that carries you away
i pry, but you can't rely on me, it's a game
you have ten year old demons here to stay
repercussions, trampoline jumping - we're fun
i was drawn to your words and your story
i'm a civilian, i'm boring, 9 to 5 and a mortgage
along with your love, my hopes are up
a penny for your thoughts, a farthing for some action
get around to keeping quiet, lies are on deposit
i got a credit with karma, we made a bargain
devil tried to sell my soul, god bought cheap
cement in the basement, stars in the attic
i write these words, this is my tactic
to get a point, across, paradise lost

Button Eyes

you make the stars seem closer, the world seem over, only setting up for a new beginning
i try and listen as the block thickens, make a way, a cross, drag it fifty feet or more
progress is when we drop it
too crazy to continue, an insane innuendo, take a minute, spare a second, i keep on self forgetting
hand your hat in, hands in pockets, famished and rail thin we vanish in thin air, we look closer there - read that twice
you're a bit scarce, cloaked in a garment from a deceased relative, it's all completely relative and thanks for that
learn a lesson, take a step back so you can fit in, it's fantasy
all these words are so abrasive, cut open like a steak knife, you're so irresistible, an artistic criminal, and think you can pin me down, we move around
ohhh this little light of mine, we can't let it die
i cried when you went blind, lost your button eyes, they were hanging by a thread, same eyes that wanted me dead, i still wish them the best
they said "you're up the river with no paddle" and i bet you can't imagine, waters so rough they do damage, but so shallow you can't drown in

Stay Put

your lava low standards
an affair that vanished
an April away from grieving and pain
without winter’s visible breath
an acrid stench that you possess and airport people problems
sorry your plane is grounded
oh i know you think you got it bad
but it’s horrible in fact
payback for the childhood you lack
a return to the jungle
you were cool, loose, let it all hang out
it’s upsetting, no protection
i got you like detention, i’ll see you after school
show you what a pastor do
tell you what they don’t
i am hell on earth, drag you down to the pits
don’t get scared, this is it
you can scream i still won’t stop
we the team, they all get shot
say “get loud i’ll choke you out”
make a sound when I go down
i’ll tear it up but you can’t shout
you nasty just like me, you ain’t showered it’s been weeks
you a bitch and i back down
you beat me black and blue
say “be grateful i’ll draw blood
lately bruises ain’t enough”
we go head to head, winner takes the unwilling back to bed
resistance gets us bothered
sinners like our fathers
forgiveness just gets tarnished
i’m whack as fuck to stay put
look to me to know what lonely do
and know what lonely don’t
hacker of my extravagant parts
you raise hell in a timely fashion and it’s wildly romantic
i just look on
a love that can’t be compromised